Stopover: Neosho, MO

After the bustle of Main Street America fled to suburban strip malls and big-box retailers, some towns fought back. One of the best downtown revivals in the Ozarks is being led by Neosho, Missouri.

[Neosho, MO, on Google Maps]



I stumbled through historic Neosho by accident, driving in my usual pattern of navigation by impulse, rather than by GPS. Sometimes wandering Ozarkland just means discovering chicken houses you haven't seen before. This time, it was a genuine reward and surprise, a bit of a treasure.



Neosho has a welcome Ozark vibe from native stone used heavily throughout the downtown area and local neighborhoods. Nearby hills and limestone springs provide a pleasant backdrop, as well. Circling city blocks on foot, I spotted buildings in the style of Victorian, Art Deco, International, cottage, mid-century kitsch, and Spanish design. Neosho packs a lot of scenery and architectural details in a relatively short walk.



The centerpiece of downtown is the Newton County Courthouse, a Depression-era Works Progress Administration project. It's fantastically Art Deco, with ornate scales of justice over entryways and "Justice is Truth in Action" carved into the stonework. The recently renovated "Civic" is also a beautifully restored Deco landmark.



The most inspiring aspect of the "Flowerbox City" is that there is a concerned effort to maintain the charm of its downtown district through private investment and public assistance. Despite the town's small size and likely economic woes, plenty of attention has been paid to the particulars. Public building upkeep, landscaping, streetlights, and sidewalks show civic pride in abundance.



What do you finding rusting in the weeds of most small towns? Tractors and old pick'em up trucks? Try a Volvo PV544. Oh, and that's a Corvette Stingray in the shop behind it. I had a Gearhead moment.



If discovered, Neosho would have the multifarious structure and charm to rival downtown efforts in Eureka Springs and Fayetteville, Arkansas. Let's hope it gets found out.

Craigslist Update: Ozark Rolling Malaise

In the late 1970s, gas lines were too long and shorts were too short. In the midst of Jimmy Carter's woeful "national malaise," cars took a turn for the crappy. They were generally slow, heavy lumps with engines choked by slapdash emissions systems. Worse, the most popular color was brown. Metallic brown.



Craigslist reveals the Ozarks are a polyester fountain of solid gold hits from this period, and we need to take a look. Slick back your eyebrows, and let's dive bell-bottoms-first into these beautiful beasts.

First off, there's something momentous about a 1970s Cadillac. They're gigantic, and ride as smoothly as a water bed (yet handle corners worse than a water bed). A time capsule of period style and extravagance, Caddys were the choice of every well-heeled professional, from oil tycoons to pimps. Even Ozark trucking magnate J.B. Hunt had one, and it was for sale in Bentonville recently. What can brown do for you?



"Now this was a superior machine. Ten grand worth of gimmicks and high-priced special effects. The rear windows lit up with a touch like frogs in a dynamite pond. The dashboard was full of esoteric lights and dials and meters that I would never understand." - Raoul Duke, driving a Cadillac in Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas


This 1979 Trans-Am is the curl in your mullet, the flavor in your flavor-saver. Glorious light blue leather, white snowflake wheels, and a mandatory blue firechicken on the hood. Kicker? This one from Rogers is much like the one owned by Vice President Joe Biden.




The seventies don't end there, baby. Here's a disco-fresh 1977 Corvette in Rogers with bitchin' custom paint and white leather interior. I have to credit for it being a legitimate, poser-proof four-speed (not an automatic), but I'm still seeing Mark Hamill in Corvette Summer here. A bare-chested gold medallion on wheels.




An icon of the late seventies and early eighties was the Checker Marathon. On the sitcom Taxi, the Marathon was as much as star as Andy Kaufman or Danny DeVito. The Checker Motor Company built almost nothing but taxis, and they were a fixture of urban movie sets.



While the taxicab version was common, the stretched Checker Aerobus was super-rare, and guess where you can find a pristine sedan-back eight-door? Rogers, Arkansas. Wow.


Lastly, this 1984 Jaguar XJ6, the youngest in the group. The Series III Jag XJ was born in the late 1970s, a time when Britain spent most of its time on strike. This meant the car's electrics and rust protection worked about as much as the people who assembled it. Don't look for many left on the road.


However, any living, breathing Jaguar of this vintage is a special thing, as only a labour of love could keep one running. Sometimes you get real devotion, and a 5.7L LS1 from a 2001 Corvette appears under the bonnet, as with this one in Bentonville. Take a stately car that's gone sixes and sevens, nick a stonking great Yank V8, and Bob's your uncle.

Smashing.

The Rustic Ozarks

If steel authored the motoring age, rust will be its postscript. All roadside history not razed by the flux of progress will eventually succumb to the elements. The trappings of driving culture and the vehicles that took us there are vulnerable to decay, and they merit exploration before they're gone.


A license plate privacy fence at a junkyard on the Arkansas-Missouri border on Highway 59.


An Ozark vista West of Jasper on Arkansas 74.


The carcass of a long-dead vehicle at Hobbs State Park. Some variety of pre-war truck?


A long-unheeded prohibition on fishing and hunting from the Board of Health at Lake Atalanta.


A little rust, a few loose nails. The century-old Powell Bridge looks sound to me.


What are you worrying about? This place seems legit. The Hillbilly Cabin, South of Huntsville on Arkansas 23.


Decommissioned Conoco fuel pumps in Anderson, MO.

Are your tetanus shots up to date?